NY DIARY: HEARTS EVERWHERE

heart leaf

MAY 19, 2016

IT’S BEEN A MONTH SINCE MY MUM PASSED AWAY, TWO SINCE MY SISTER PASSED…


… and it’s still totally surreal. I’m still in shock, numb, in a daze. Maybe in denial, I’m not totally sure. I am sure that I’m a ticking tear-bomb. The mere mention of my mum or sister, and I just burst into tears, whenever, wherever. I try to avoid any situation where the subject may arise because I just can’t control my emotions. I think I can, but I can’t.

I wake up some mornings and think it’s all a bad dream, that’s if I haven’t lay awake all night over-thinking the ‘what-if’s, or ‘I should have’s’, or ‘should have saids’!

The only comforting thing is I’m still seeing hearts… everywhere… I have since the day mum passed. Drops of water, leaves on trees, leaves that have fallen {like the one above I found on our driveway}, chewing gum on the pavement, clouds – that are all heart-shaped – and I cherish that!

.. and I have my beautiful family around me, supporting me, loving me and making me so proud.

Wishing you and your family happiness and health {because, really, that’s all the is important}…
love NY x

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